Guest Blog by April Young

I have never been a fan of small talk. I’m kind of impatient, and I like to get into the good parts of conversations quickly. However, when your business depends on networking and building connections to grow, small talk is a valuable tool in your arsenal! I have learned over the years to slow down and enjoy the mundane parts of conversation, the parts where you get to learn about people and get to know them, with no pressure, and no expectations!

Building connections with people, especially potential clients and referral partners, is a process. It takes time to build the know, like, and trust factor, and you can’t just jump right into business with people…at least not usually (we all hope for that one client that instantly wants to work with us…it happens, but not very often! 😉).

Back to small talk. Does anyone really care what the weather is doing or who won last week’s basketball game? Probably not, but general topics like the weather or sports are terrific icebreakers. Most of the time, in a group of people who don’t know each other, they are all just waiting for someone, anyone, to start a conversation, regardless of the topic.

What a great opportunity this presents! Remember how I said that I have never been a fan of small talk? It turns out I just didn’t understand how to use it. As I have attended more and more networking events and met new people over the last year, I have learned how to leverage small talk to help me make amazing connections. Today, I am going to share some of the ways small talk can benefit you and the people you wish to connect with!

1. Common Ground: Starting a new conversation with a “What do you think of this weather” question is a great way to establish common ground with someone. By using a topic that is common to each of you, you begin to create a rapport and a way to relate to the person. Depending on the situation, you could chat about the event you are attending or the theme of the event.

2. Demonstrate Empathy: When you engage in small talk, you demonstrate a willingness to listen and connect with others on a personal level. Empathy goes a long way when you are trying to connect with people. Especially after the circumstances of the last few years, people are hungry for other people to engage with that can understand where they have been and where they are going.

3. Build Rapport: Small talk helps you build rapport by creating a more relaxed and comfortable atmosphere. When you discuss mundane topics that don’t require any knowledge or experience, other than just living in the moment, people will relax and feel more at ease. When people feel at ease with each other, they are more likely to actively engage in conversation.

4. Strengthen Relationships: Small talk is just as valuable with people you already know as it is with people you don’t! By re-engaging in small talk with someone you have met previously, you can build a foundation of familiarity and shared experiences that can help deepen your connection with them.

5. Show Interest: When you engage in small talk, you demonstrate that you are interested in the other person beyond just business or formalities. You show the person that you value them as a human just by being interested in them. This builds connection easily since people generally like to feel appreciated and valued. The easiest way to start a conversation in which you can show interest is to ask someone what they do or where they are from, or to compliment them! A sincere compliment is a sure way to get someone to start a conversation with you!

6. Improve Communication: Small talk can help improve communication between individuals by allowing them to get to know each other's communication style, sense of humor, and personality in a no-pressure, low-expectation environment, which leads to a better understanding of that person and more effective communication in the future.

7. Create Opportunities: You never know where your small talk will take you. It can act as a simple ice breaker to get a conversation started, but it may also lead to discovering mutual interests, goals, or opportunities to collaborate or gain a new client. 

Remember, small talk is not just a trivial exchange of words or a useless waste of time. Instead, I want you to understand that the seeds of connection are sown in small talk! That’s right! Small talk provides an opportunity to create an environment of openness without pressure and establish a foundation for a strong relationship. 

By creating a space for another person to interact with you, share a conversation with you, and get to know you, you can build a strong rapport and establish a level of trust that leads to a deeper connection. The next time you find yourself in a situation where small talk is necessary, take a deep breath and remember that it could be the beginning of a beautiful (and profitable) relationship.

April Young
10-4 Communications, LLC
april@10-4communications.biz
www.10-4communications.biz